I had an interesting conversation with a friend at work today. This friend and I share the same faith so I know his views are similar to mine in many areas. We have a fun time sitting around and discussing where we should be yet we aren’t. Normally after these conversations I walk away laughing and not a lot changes. After today’s conversation I am hoping to have a different result.
Today’s conversation consisted of what our ultimate goal is (Exaltation), and if the choices we make in life are consistent with what is needed to reach such a goal. I must say, sadly in many ways I do not believe mine are. Do not get me wrong. For the most part I believe I live a pretty good life, make good choices and try really hard…J I love my wife and children and can honestly say they are my top priority.
Unfortunately, I think in some weird ways that is where my problem is. My first and top priority should be me. I know that sounds selfish but if my ultimate goal is to be exalted, and be with my wife and family forever then I need to get myself there first. If I have not lived my life in a way worthy of obtaining this goal then what was it all for, is my family really my priority (Shelley-yes they definitely are)?
One of the main areas of discussion that made me ponder this issue was talking about the expectations we have for our children. Since when did holding your children to higher standards then you hold yourself become acceptable. How in the world can I expect my fourteen year old son (soon to be fifteen) to not watch television on Sunday when it is ok for mom and dad? How can I expect my children to talk softly and kindly to each other when I do not always? Trust me the list of expectations is much longer, which I am sure my children would be happy to tell you. I can honestly say I have been expecting more of my children then I am willing to give myself.
Other than your relationship with your spouse (love yah hun), there is almost nothing that I should be willing to do that I would not allow my children to do. I guess in many ways I am a hypocrite. One example is a guilty pleasure called Sons of Anarchy (I have many just not sharing all of them J). Great show and I am now in season 3. I would never in a million years allow my children to watch it. So why do I?
If I do not allow my children to do something because there is inappropriate material involved why should it be appropriate to me? Well it is appropriate to me because I hold myself to a lower standard. With that being said does this sound like someone worthy of reaching such a goal.
This was just one small example of how I feel I, and probably many others, hold our children to higher standards then we do our self. I really believe that as long as this is my mentality and method of rearing my family how can I expect the results I am striving for.
Once again it is time to clean the house that is ME. I need to not have a season 4 with the SonsL. I must get up that ladder and be two rungs ahead of my family and not pushing up on them from below. I owe them that.
Brigham Young said “We should never permit ourselves to do anything that we are not willing to see our children do. We should set them an example that we wish them to imitate.”
I need to be better starting yesterday.
Remember, it is your family that fills your cup, and my cup is always full.
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